mylife(t +1 year)...!

If people remember SAS, yep! the dreaded signals and systems, we used to represent 2 signals of types, x(t-T) and x(t+T). this post of mine is to be considered mylife(t+1year)! i would give a thumbs up to those electronics guys and girls who could guess it now only what i would be talking about!

Well... the reason why i chose such a cryptic start is because as i told i am crazy about physics and maths the blend of which is SAS!okay. let's start with the business of me writing (like one crazy girl whom people might think is there to change the world!).. my life past 1 year has been, to sum up a pot of experiments! i can say i've refound myself! answers to few of my unanswered questions have started unfolding! a great start i would say! a year in bangalore though a familiar place has made me sturdy! life has become more interesting with confrontations everyday! confrontation between the expectations and the outcome, the likes and dislikes, helplessness and opportunity, assertion v/s timidity and finally being myself as i want to be v/s as others want me to be! i would say a dilemma between complacency and the urge to do something!

A transformation from student life to industrial/corporate has been, i can say has made me see the real world! it has made me realise, wake up! this is where u got to live the rest of ur life! one thing is for sure! Student life is the golden life! very true! for a guy, it is a life not bothered by tax, savings, pay package! and for a girl, it is a life of aspirations! the days where she believes she can do something and show the world out there that we are no less! . i would dare not say all when i mention this, coz i have seen guys who lack a vision of their life and girls, who have hardly got any opportunity to assert themselves and who lose their identity before they can find one!those men folks reading this might find i am a bit partial towards girls.. :)

I have had 'encounters' with some of the most 'interesting species' on earth i would say! (yep! sarcasm at its best. no marks for guessing! ) people who are unusually and irritatingly curious of other's lives! but yep! as they say, it is human mind. it behaves how we train it. but one thing for sure. the initial irritation has given way to me trying to become a good HR manager! ;) before joining the job, i had the opinion that technical job is the toughest one and why they have these MBAs and all! but now i believe, human mind is far more unpredictable and difficult to manage than an IC! that's the good part! isnt it? may be that's why they say look at the glass as always half full (although most of the times i see it half empty! see again- the human mind! ) .

One thing i am amazed at it is the human ability to adapt! may be it is in our blood.. ask anyone how they felt the day they left their college! may be people would've cried(even boys) who find difficult to leave the nest of strong bonds which would've built over time! (i may say, my string of bonds are very weak outside the family except for very few for as i have told many times earlier, people find me difficult to handle! ;p ) but a year later, i woud like to ask my fellow college mates, how they feel now! time has an amazing effect on us i feel.. or may be we get used to things after a transition period.

hmm.. the year ahead.. is as blank a white paper, on which the 'pens of thoughts, ideas, aspirations, expectations + inhibitions, fears' are competing to write! 12th month from now i would be able to say who won the competition and the places! :)

after a long break!

Hi all!!!
It's been 7 months since i became visible thru my blog.. although there were many things to tell, share, somehow i couldnt. there is one question boggling me since some time. what happens when we try change something which has been there for quite a long time? let us start from my(assuming there are people out there to lend both their eyes and 'brain' to whatever i write!! :p) own habits.. for me first there will be an apprehension about what if something goes wrong which i assume has been right till now.. i would be kind of complacent with what is there or what is given. but the turmoil starts the moment i start thinking of something different... okay..after initial inhibition, hesitation everything, there comes a day i start with something new, different. there comes the real test! coz then not only you but others will also know that u are upon (and may be in the longer run that i am 'upto' )something! something what? they might not know but yes they know something is there! 'fishy' may be! hmm... the journey there on, i would say a bag of mixed feelings. it is a continuous test of identity, individuality and of course patience.it brings one to confront one's own beliefs. at times i would have to rethink on what i believe in. who is more important to me, the one who is in me(give it any name) or those who are outside with whom i have to be with everyday? dont many of us feel that we live in two different worlds?? one which is exclusively ours where u know what u want, what u like, what u want to do and be and at the same what or who u 'dont' want to be!. then there is another one where u dont live for yourselves but for others, no doubt for our own so called material benefits. with my observations (mention, not a survey though! ) it is easy to find people who live in the latter world. but one can hardly find those who live in the former coz the world outside may just not allow that! but i feel there are many who are stuck in the middle path sometimes confused which way to go! confused coz we definitely dont live in a dream world! it is so brutally practical that people tend to forget the means and where only the end matters...... and that is where these 'path finders' get lost. it may be impractical to have ideals and principles. it may be foolish also! but i feel it is a binding and driving factor to our otherwise monotonous lives. i would not recommend one to go after a euphoric goal. like they say choti si aasha, ek choti si thought to otherwise usually accepted or taken for granted norms can do wonders i belive! but i should add that the test of this belief of mine is still going on.. the day i give up or i am proven false, i would say just scrap this post of mine!

When the melting pot starts boiling....

With my previous post on Live-in relationships and this post, I may not be the only one thinking of two extremities which can happen only in India! At one side we have people embracing western culture without even thinking what suits us and what not. The other side we can find those who dont want to leave the age old practices even if it costs someone's life.. If those reading this post are keeping track of the recent developments in states like Haryana, they would be aware of 'Khap' panchayats. Post independence, when they chose democracy over other forms of governments, our leaders must have visualised a more 'mature' India. One of the means to achieve this is democracy at grass root levels which gives more authority to the local bodies. At the same time it seems very important for the elected local bodies to have more accountability.

At times it becomes difficult to decide which path to take- should we remain the same old snake charmers in the eyes of the western world or show the world that India is the 'melting pot' for all cultures? But before that shouldn't we learn to get rid of the practices which are as henious as killing someone in the name of 'honour'? When it comes to marriages, there will always be a society which takes greater interest sometimes not necessary at all unless things become harmful to the society in any way. i've personally felt this many times- why is it that some people are always bothered about other's personal lives when there are so many other issues haunting our society?

'Live in'- why can't we 'Leave out' ??

In my college days the most popular topic for debate used to be 'love marriages and arranged marriages'. But these days it is to be changed to 'live in relationships or marriage' i guess. With the supreme court ruling that says no legal issues with live-in relationships, it just occured to me, is it only law which builds a healthy society? In a society like ours which took decades to accept the love marriages where even to this day there are people who attach a stigma to the very idea, what good can a concept of 'live-in' do? 'Marriage' in itself is an idea which our people have given us for a better way of life. Just because it is followed from thousands of years it doesnt mean one has to discard it in order to be/be called 'modern'. What is it that makes a relationship- love or trust or commitment or responsibility or all of them? If it is a relationship of convenience, there is no place for all said above. Apart from emotional aspects, what could be other consequences?Looking at the statistics of dowry deaths, domestic violence, what is the guarantee that this law is not misused and doesnt result in undue effects on society. Of course it is undeniable that the institution of marriage comes with its own pros and cons. but does that mean live-in could be a substitute for that? what should we focus on- empowering women with more moral and legal support to have a successful life or should we resort to 'relationships of convenience' ? At the end, one cant stop thinking of this- what about the children of tomorrow? what values would be left to pass onto them and what could be expected of them??? All said and done, ultimately it is for an individual to decide , is it necessary to 'live-in' or can we -'leave it out'?

Individuality v/s impression !

I dont know how clear i am with my post's title.. what i meant to say is, 'will we lose our identity in an attempt to make up for a good impression' ?? i am not saying but asking :-p.. for those who have kept track of my blog since beginning (again hoping atleast there are a few ;) ), way back in one of the posts, i've written on impression- First impression until it is the best. So, if people have an impression on us, how much responsible are we for that? should we attempt so much so to impress others that we lose ourselves in the due course? after some time, we start asking ourselves, am i who others perceive me as? after all i am not able to decide how to define a 'good impression'.. opinions differ, perceptions differ.. in that case, is it possible to impress everyone? Definitely not! atleast according to me.... above all, impression is just a matter of minutes.. but identity is for life time.. so what is long lasting is what is worth it.. isnt it???

Reconnecting to the outside world..

Well.. almost 4 months..i had to keep myself away from the outside world. ask why! coz i had no access to newspaper everyday.. i dont say i am obsessed with reading newspaper dialy. but still i felt an unusual disconnectedness.... after all a news paper is not only about politics. it is about opinions, celebrations and sufferings at the same time.. well...some might argue one cannot change the world by reading just what happens. but sure one can change one's own ways of thinking and doing if there is a discussion relevant to his/her lives and happenings... although it feels sad to read about all the pain and sufferings everyday, i feel it is just a way of connecting to the outside world. and above all, i just admire the people who work for a newspaper (unlike news channes which these days resort to all kinds of rubbish programmes just for publicity ) for their timely work and especially the punctuality.. i wish if I could be one of them which seems highly impossible which is evident thru how (ir)regularly i update my one and only blog! :-P

Being a girl....

Hmmm... these days i think a lot about myself! i wonder how would i describe myself to someone who is totally strange to me and would it match with how others find me. btw no philosophy[ i must remind this time and again i think ;) ]. what makes me think like this is - people have a notion that girls need to be submissive. being polite is a different thing. but if u talk assertive, is it being arrogant? or if you express your views regardless of other's opinions. how fair it is if views/opinions are changed according to whom you are talking? and there comes the question of identity. being a girl, is it wrong to expect an identity for ourselves???

Something missing!

how do i start???! well.. hmmm.. yep! (enough of initial settings i think :p ).. i've felt this many times in my life so far.(by life i mean mostly since i joined engineering coz it was only then i had to choose between things. otherwise before that i had a definite goal for my life. i believe so! ).. coming back to the topic. i've strongly felt there is something missing. i wont be sure what it is. at times i feel i can do lots of things.even impossible. yet again at other times the same 'me' inside tells dont dream too big for expectations not met will lead to disappointment. hmmm.. but i feel it is best to believe in efforts. if not immediately, sometime in future the result is ensured. (no philosophy! my experience :) )... but what bugs my mind is, certain things are so sure that we can define how we want them to be. but some other things, we wil not have even a hint of what and how things are going to happen. how to receive such things? 'all is well' only if things happen the way we want or we expect them to. but ultimately, why dont things happen the way we want them to be????

My life in 2010!

A BIG HI! to all those who read my blog (hoping that there are a few atleast :P). I was not to be seen on my blog these days. I know and I was feeling guilty whenever i remembered me commenting on one of my friend's blog for not updating it quite often. Well i am back finally coz i am feeling like writing again. I enjoy writing but is it the same feeling with the one who reads my mind?? I dont know. I dont want to know also! (before i forget this dialogue it came so instantly coz of listening to it quite often in my office these days. remember that famous dialogue from Mungaaru male?? "Artha aaglilla... Artha aagadu beda bidi! ..." Influenced by that :) ) Anyways, back to my topic of now. My life in 2010.. I am not going to tell the tale of my life in the last 10 days or so. it so happened i was just browsing on facebook for the crazy applications it has. And i found one which said 'find out what will happen to you in 2010'.. Although i dont believe in all those things but definitely i am curious to know what it is going to tell.. so set on it. it asked some questions( how much relevant i don't know! ) .. and the answers to it. Devre! i never heard of those names.. so just for the sake of it, i had to choose one of the options. and finally i got my result. and guess what it was!! It said "My love life would begin in 2010" ante!!! Hmmm........... ;) so now i should also start looking for it as in that vodafone ad in which the guy stays in the lift for the whole day coz the daily alerts said that he would find his match in the lift! :) anyways, i just wanted a start up point for writing something related to these things- alerts, predictions and things like that. many times i think do they have any influence on us even if we dont believe in such things? how do we feel whenever a prediction says something good is going to happen today? and what it would be when it is the opposite? are we not used to expecting only good things? and if we know before hand that something good is going to happen, don't we feel a tinge of happiness or an excitement atleast? whatever may be the person's views regarding astrology or something related to it... after all we all hope for good things... i think regardless of our opinions or views we have certain psychological reactions to things like these. but again it depends on what scale they affect us. there comes our beliefs....that's enough i guess! :)